Becoming A WhippAss
What the hell is a Trail WhippAss and why do you want to become one? First off, none of us know what the hell a WhippAss is. Some say its a pun on words, some say its a mythical creature that runs through the forest seeking out mud, roots, rocks, and calls the gnarliest trails it can find home. Some say its BigFoots Sister, or the Yeti's father, or even Beowulf's long forgotten son. Theres a rumor that Trail WhippAsses like to meet up in groups and take selfies while jumping... nobody knows its just a rumor.
What I can tell you is, the TrailWhippas is badass and you want to become one. If you want to join them on their regular romps through the woods and leaping selfies theres just a few qualifications.
You've gotta eat dirt for breakfast, and mud for desert. And bull shit, you've got none of that unless its stuck on the bottom of your shoe. Drama, hell no. Trail WhippAsses skipped out on that class. Oh and don't be offended by the F bomb, Trail WhippAsses drop them on the daily.
Trail WhippAsses like to run far. It's been said they have been known to travel up to and over 100 miles in a single day. So how about you try to run a trail marathon or more each year?
Trail WhippAsses are super friendly and loveable creatures once you get to know them, but they are a loving protecting bunch. It's no light business bounding off through the woods and over mountains. And Trail WhippAsses always have eachothers backs, they will fight off a bear, share some spare food or waterbottle, or spend the coldest of nights pacing their fellow WhippAss through races... so trust goes a long way. Please don't come unsolicted, get a current Trail WhippAss to sponsor you.
Becoming A WhippAss:
If you meet the qualifications above, you can email us at Membership@TrailWhippAss.com. If you meet the qualifications for membership something magical will happen and soon enough you'll be a Trail WhippAss enjoying the trails jumping for selfies.
Trail WhippAsses like swag, so once you join the ranks of the Trail WhippAsses grinding dirt out under you, you can get some sweet swag and wear your colors proud.
If you have any questions feel free to contact us at leadership@TrailWhippAss.com